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Channel: The ADHD Homestead

Part of knowing my worth is remembering what I’ve accomplished

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Life with ADHD can get pretty hectic — especially if you’re like me and have the industrious, “driven by a motor,” always needing to do something, never able to relax variety. At the end of the day, I want to feel tired. I also want to feel like I’ve accomplished something. While I have no trouble staying busy and working hard, that feeling of accomplishment is harder to come by. I can spend an entire day working, yet still feel like I got nothing done. Sometimes this means I’ve mismanaged my work time. Tried to multitask too much. Other times,…Continue reading 

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How to get places on time when you have ADHD

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I recently had a stressful experience getting my covid-19 vaccine. Nothing went wrong. I didn’t have concerns about the vaccine. I was ready to get it, and I even cried a little when they handed me my card. One hundred percent of my stress came from having to arrive at a specific place, at a specific time. It’d been a while. I got out of practice during the pandemic. I had wanted to write about morning routines today. Many of us will return to work and school outside our homes soon, if we haven’t already. But morning routines aren’t the…Continue reading 

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ADHD + DIY projects: It’s okay if the end doesn’t look like I planned (Project Engineering Series, Part 3)

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Many ADHDers struggle to plan, start, and finish projects successfully. The fallout from this haunts every corner of our lives. I’ve written a series of posts about project management and ADHD, using my back garden as an example. This project could’ve created the domestic conflict and neighborhood eyesore so familiar to so many of us. But I’m happy to report it was a success! The new garden only slightly resembles my original plan, and I may change it in the future. That’s kind of the point. This project reminded me of three big ADHD-friendly project management skills: Build in flexibility…Continue reading 

The post ADHD + DIY projects: It’s okay if the end doesn’t look like I planned (Project Engineering Series, Part 3) appeared first on The ADHD Homestead.

It’s easy to fall behind. Trying to buckle down and get caught up doesn’t help.

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In the past couple sessions of our Order from Chaos workshop on Patreon, we’ve talked about getting behind. Letting the piles take over. ADHD makes this easy to do. It also makes it hard to undo. This might sound like a dim outlook, but it is possible to get caught up. The key is to separate that goal — getting caught up — from the everyday grind of staying caught up. When we combine them, we decrease our chances of succeeding at either. Our piles keep growing. Trying to “catch up” really just catches us in a cycle of perfectionism.…Continue reading 

The post It’s easy to fall behind. Trying to buckle down and get caught up doesn’t help. appeared first on The ADHD Homestead.

What to say instead of “I feel like you don’t care the house is a mess.”

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Our little ADHD household is in a strange season. With summer came a transition from Pandemic Mode into Let’s-Do-What-We-Can-While-We-Can Mode. On one hand, I know I need to stretch a little more than I normally would. We don’t know what the fall holds for us. If we can safely enjoy time with family and friends we’ve missed over the past year and a half, we should. At the same time, I’m burned out. Stuff has piled up. I need another hour in the day, another day in the week. I want to pause time just long enough to clean up…Continue reading 

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Is “time blindness” an ableist term?

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Every once in a while a gentle reader shoots me a comment or an email about my use of the term time blindness. I once saw my work reshared with a content warning re: my use of the term. They explained time blindness was a more commonplace and accepted descriptor for ADHDers’ time perception impairments when I published my article (roughly two years prior). Some folks in the ADHD and disability advocacy communities have come to see time blindness as ableist language. Many consider it harmful to use the word “blind” to describe anything other than visual impairment. I agree…Continue reading 

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How academic ability masked my obvious ADHD as a kid

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This is the first in a series of posts about my journey from ADHD-oblivious, to ADHD-curious, to where I am today. See the full series here. I could’ve gotten an ADHD diagnosis in high school. Maybe even sooner. I could’ve avoided years of stress, anxiety, shame, and overwhelming emotional highs and lows. Instead of wondering why everyone else seemed to live by a rulebook I couldn’t see, I could’ve had a toolbox to help me navigate my life and relationships. The ADHD red flags arrived on my report cards in first grade. Unfortunately, no one recognized them. Not even the…Continue reading 

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“Let’s be chill.” Or, how to maximize stress on a one-night trip.

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“I’m trying to relax.” “This can be a chill trip.” “It’s only one night.” When I heard myself say these words last weekend, an alarm sounded in the back of my mind. I tried to ignore it. After all, it was only one night. We would leave Saturday morning to visit out-of-town relatives and return Sunday afternoon. Not even thirty-six hours. Hardly any time to miss anything I might forget. And how much could I possibly need in the first place? I always say — I may even say officially in Order from Chaos — I can’t do a chill…Continue reading 

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Giving myself a break can help me stay on track—who knew?

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If you’ve read my blog in January, you know I don’t buy into New Year’s resolutions. This particular January I’ve taken things a step farther and made intentional efforts to reduce my focus on goals. I know this sounds weird, especially from someone who’s written a whole book about achieving your goals with ADHD. But hear me out. Stereotypes would have us believe ADHD is all inconsistency and lack of focus. We can’t stick with anything, we get distracted, all that jazz. And I can definitely describe myself this way! However, ADHD is not so much an issue of attention…Continue reading 

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There’s more than one way to avoid tedious prep for a fun project 😉

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I love projects. That said, not all ADHD people do. Maybe it depends where we exist on the hyperactive-inattentive continuum. I have a lot of restless energy, which I often channel  into industriousness. This has its benefits and its drawbacks. One benefit: I’m quite driven to do things. Tackling an ambitious project feels exciting (hello, dopamine rush). Under the right circumstances, I can get hooked on little bits of progress. This has pushed me through several ADHD feats of strength over the years. An accompanying drawback: I struggle to direct this energy. I’ll skip to the exciting part of the…Continue reading 

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